I found your website and it gave me a glimmer of hope. For the last six months, I have been on a quest to find a "family friendly" employer. I just had my first child at the age of 35, after having spent years thinking I would never be a mother. The original plan was for me to either quit working altogether for the first three years of our son's life, or work part-time. Then, in the fifth month of my pregnancy, my husband took off for places unknown and I was forced to have to go back to work. I love working and having a career, but I so much wanted to spend more than two hours a day with my son. I am not ashamed to say that my situation is very depressing to me. There just don't seem to be enough "women-run" or at least "family friendly" companies out there. It would be ideal for me to work flex time or to telecommute. Believe me, I have done nothing but surf the net for the last six months, sending out resumes and looking into the possibility of starting my own business, but I just don't have enough money to invest.

I would be so appreciative if you could point me in the direction of some resources for finding the kind of employment I desire at this time in my life. My son will only be a baby once. I don't want to miss it. Thanks for listening. - Terri

Thanks for your honest note to FEMINIST.COM. Unfortunately, I don't think that your experience or your frustration are uncommon. I was raised by a single mother, who always struggled with working and raising a child. The good news is that although my mother always worked, my memory is that she was always there for me. I think that this was mostly due to the feeling she left me with--and her encouragement to call for anything and everything.

The most immediate companies to come to mind are Patagonia and Smith & Hawkin, but these are from memory only and I'm not sure where they are located and what is even available. For more specific information about "family friendly companies"--I suggest that you access the follow resources:

1. Working Woman and Working Mother--just did stories on the "100 best companies for women to work." I'm not sure what their criteria is, but it's worth investigating.
2. Catalyst (212-777-8900)--which works to get executive women on boards and into corporate America--also honors "great companies for women." Again, I'm not sure about their criteria.
3. Co-op America --which has a whole list of "socially responsible companies."
4. FEMINIST.COM's Women Owned Businesses section
5. The Feminist Dollar: The Wise Woman's Buying Guide by Phyllis Katz and Margaret Katz; Plenum Trade, New York/London 1997, which includes a rating system and details about how they rated the companies. They cover a number of industries and seem to give a good sense of who the good guys are. Visit the FEMINIST.COM Bookstore for this books and other ideas.

I hope these suggestions are of use and that you can find an employer who knows--and respects--that parenting is also a full time job.

—Amy