I am a single mom with 3 kids. I am a elevator mechanic. I do not receive child support and have been to court a hundred times. The judge awarded me $55 dollars a week because of how much money I made. I joined Aces which gave me lots of info but still this man gets away with murder. I earn $36,000 dollars a year and I give him his children every weekend because I swore not to punish the children but he has never paid and the court treats me like I am bothering them. Yes, I work but my rent is $1000 dollars and we know what it costs to feed clothe and educate kids. I want this man to pay his $55 dollars - he doesn't provide health insurance, college funding or anything. These are his kids. Why is the court so uncooperative? It seems the city only goes after welfare moms exes to reduce there own spending.

Thanks for your note to FEMINIST.COM. I recently read an article about a new rule implemented by the United Nations, whereby any UN employee who is responsible for child support has it automatically deducted from his paycheck. I know that others have suggested/tried to enforce a similar program. It makes sense--especially in the face of so many parents who don't honor this commitment.

A few years ago I was trying to get someone to do a study on the percentages of women who were required to pay child support and did so (or didn't) compared to men. My assumption is that many more women honored this commitment. (Given many fewer women are in this situation.)

Assuming there is no way to enact the above, and assuming that you don't want to deny him custody if only to temporarily make him realize the consequences... Obviously going to court doesn't seem to be working--in this case the problem is first with him--for not honoring what is required of him--and then the system that hasn't yet found a mechanism to enforce this. Since the latter doesn't seem to be changing, perhaps making some proposal to the judge/attorney, about an automatic deducation.

I hope that helps. I often laugh because my father was required to pay child support and he never did and I dream of trying to get it some day--only to prove a point. You can't avoid today what will inevitable come back to haunt you tomorrow. Good luck.

—Amy