home what'snew resources ask amy news activism antiviolence events marketplace aboutus
Ask a Question!
Meet Amy!
Amy's Resource Guide
Ask Amy Main
TOPICS
Feminism
Girls/Children
Health
International
Media
Miscellaneous
Most Asked Questions
Politics
Reproductive Rights
Sexual Harassment
Violence Against Women
Women's History
Work/Career
   
 
 
 
Girls/ Children

I have contacted EVERY state department I can think of, to no avail. I have a 15 year old step daughter, that until this summer, lived with me. She is now living with her Mother, who is allowing her to date and have sexual relations with a 27 year old man who is divorced with 2 kids. One of his kids lives full time with my step daughter now, and calls her mommy.

Her father and I have gone to the police and CPS. The police said we don't have enough evidence, even though we have it in both of their writings that this is going on. They actually told us to do our own investigation, such as sitting outside her mother's house and checking her underwear. CPS investigated VERY briefly, went to the house, asked her and her mother if this was going on, they both denied it, and CPS pretty much washed their hands. I am at a loss for where to turn. Any advise would be very helpful.

Thank you,

Jennifer

   

Dear Jennifer --

What's unclear from your note is what the actual custody report states. If it states the child is suppose to be with her father, that seems like a pretty easy thing to revisit since otherwise what she is doing is in violation of that court order. If that's not the case, then perhaps you just need to revisit custody document. The police, sadly, are only going to intervene if there is "harm" -- and just dating isn't harm. However, if you can prove that they have had sex, then that is their jurisdiction since it would now be classified as statutory rape.

If the child herself were expressing interest in no longer being with her mother, there are also advocacy organizations for children -- namely Advocates for Children [Editor's note: AFC has branches for each state. Use Google to find yours here) It sounds like your best bet might be to use the issue of custody and revisit that document -- either to enforce or to change it.

The court might appoint a guardian ad litem to assess what is in the child's best interest.

Good luck

- Amy